I thank Ms. O'Brien for the civics lesson (Los Gatos Weekly-Times letters, Dec. 11). Two years of any study should also include an environmental impact report of some form. Was one done?

As for civics, I guess my involvement earlier has helped changed things a bit around our city. I circulated and presented the petition that resulted in a vote by the Monte Sereno City Council to put stop signs on many of the streets—Daves, Vineland, etc. It really simplified the approval process.

I also started the petition drive that produced the vote by the city to replace the sheriff with the Los Gatos police department, now the Los Gatos­Monte Sereno Police Department, and our community is much safer as a result.

And when child care at Daves Avenue School was becoming a crisis, I circulated the petition that resulted in the vote to keep the Oaktree center open so there was a choice for day care.

In all three, I was subjected to verbal abuse by other residents of Monte Sereno for wanting to change things in the city. When we finally got stop signs to slow speeders on Vineland, our yard was a junkyard for more than two years as passersby would throw trash in our yard, etc. Each of these changes had multiple public hearings and vetting by the community.

I encourage citizens taking an active role in our city. I just hope they consider the impact on all of us as they focus on their particular wants.

—Bill Ferguson, Monte Sereno


Teenagers need their parents

Last year I participated in Leigh High School's "Every Fifteen Minutes" program. The assemblies that followed the previous day's mock accident scene were two of the most heart-wrenching hours I've ever spent, especially listening to Judy Peckler speak not once, but twice about the tragic consequences a drunk driver's actions had on her precious family.

One of my proudest moments as a parent occurred after the assembly, when my 16-year-old son sought me out of the huge crowd, gave me a big hug, told me how sad he felt and told me that he loved me.

When my son entered high school, I'll never forget a conversation I had with a mother whose children were older. I commented on how excited I was that my husband and I would have more time together, would be able to go out more often because we didn't need to worry about babysitters anymore. She shook her wise head and said, "You better worry about leaving him home alone. These next few years he'll need you more than ever."

Los Gatos parents would be wise to heed her words. The latest in a string of yearly tragedies is a wake-up call. We owe it to our beautiful young adults to stay home, talk to them, listen to them, set limits, provide guidance and continue to give them the same care and love we gave them when they were tiny babies cradled in our arms.

—Avril Calderwood, Los Gatos


It's not the time to point fingers

As a community we have survived much devastation ... earthquakes, fires and droughts. Our challenges were visible, our goals were common and our response was united.

Yesterday we buried one of our children. Once again we are faced with a tragedy. However, this one is not of natural causes but one of personal choices. It is vital in this time of raw giving to not place blame or point fingers but allow ourselves to hold each other's hands and embrace the memory of Eric Quesada. It is a time to be thankful for three survivors of a violent crash.

As we walk the path of grief together and shoulder our personal and collective responsibilities, let each of us listen with patient ears, look through loving eyes and respond with compassionate hearts.

Drunk driving is a national and cultural issue that is rationalized and ignored. Sadly we are all victims, again.

—Judy Peckler, Los Gatos


Concerned about teenagers in the community

I'm very concerned about our teenagers in our community after reading about the terrible car accident during the week of Thanksgiving. I want to offer some support to those involved because my heart reaches out to you.

To the kids at the party, if you are somewhere that you shouldn't be, have the strength to leave early; better yet, find another fun thing to do—you don't need to follow along. When you do go to places that could be potentially unsafe (example, a party where drugs and alcohol are being used), you will be taking chances on your own life. You want proof? You got proof the other week.

Parents: Here are ways some teenagers think before throwing a party.

* My parents let me drink in the house. Come on over. Invite friends. Let's have a party. My parents are going out of town. I know how to arrange a cool and outrageous party at my place.

* My parents don't allow drinking in my house, but people bring weed and alcohol anyway.

* My parents let me do whatever I want. They are so cool. I don't even have a curfew. As long as I make my parents look cool in front of their friends and stay out of their way, I've got freedom. Let's find out where we can party tonight.

* I found some weed in my parents' room. I know I can take some and they'll never know about it. Let's take it and you grab some vodka at your place and I'll ask someone else to grab a six-pack of beer and we'll meet up at so-and-so's house and party.

* My parents and I were at this restaurant the other night after the game that we won, and we met up with some other families from the team, and our parents were ordering these small drinks called "shooters" and they were so drunk and laughing all night long. It looked like so much fun. I'll show you what they did, and then let's have a bunch of friends over and laugh all night, too.

To all kids—OK, so there's going to be more parties, even after this terrible accident. To the kids who are reading this (and I'm hoping that there are a lot), close your eyes and picture where you are in your life. You can choose if you want to be happy or not—that you do have control over. Remember that happiness in your life when someone offers you a "hit" or a "swig" and find the strength to say, "No, thanks," because, after all, you may not wake up tomorrow.

But let's say you choose to say something like, "OK, dude, this is cool." So you take a swig or a hit or both, and then another. In all truth, you have just made your happiness go downhill. Just like that. That fast. You did it; no one else made that decision. If you choose to define coolness and decide to say "No, thanks" to a "swig" or a "hit," take this mental tool with you: Close your eyes and remember how "free and happy" you will feel the next morning when the sun comes up to greet you and your family and friends and that feeling of freedom of life. Believe me, you won't have peer pressure after that feeling. Leave the party early; you will not be behind bars or in a hospital bed or dead.

Here is another piece of advice, which my 12-year-old shared with me the other day. "Mom, you don't think twice. You think three times. One, you've already known that you shouldn't take drugs and alcohol. Two, you're at a party and maybe since your other friends are doing it, it must not be that bad, so you want to try it. Three, think again and close your eyes and remember to think about yourself and where you want to be in the morning when the sun comes up."

To all parents—OK, so there's going to be more parties, even after this terrible accident. To the parents who are reading this (and I'm hoping that there are a lot), close your eyes and picture where you are in your life. You can choose if you want to be happy or not—that you do have control over. Remember that happiness in your life, because you might need to change a few things when your teenage child is hardly around, unloving, secretive, overly happy, overly pleasing and deeply untouched by your love.

Love your kids. It's a job. If you don't feel the work involved in loving your kids, then you aren't aware and doing your job as a parent. A parent is the number-one mentor in their child's life. What is your child learning from you right now? When the sun comes up to greet you the next morning, after "the party" (for you or for them), will you be there to greet your kids with your responsibility and love? Will you know where your child is? It's something to think about. Like I said, it's my heart that reaches out to you.

—Gigi La Bouff, Los Gatos